i am thirsty

I took it as an unquenchable thirst! The competition was tough; the pressure was high, looking at others with the sense of inferiority and scepticism. Boisterous acts, inhumanely lifestyles, and clandestine filling up that temple of darkness which everyone called my heart. Fun, extenuation of problem, defying the odds, rage, obliviousness, with question running around looking for answers there will never find. My mind was searching, searching and searching for the power and superiority. I walked, walked and walked through these different roads, yet the odyssey was for nothing. Is the burden yet to come? I ask myself, with my heart doing the thinking and my brains doing the pounding. All this years I struggled yet I travelled to the most famous place “nowhere”.

Am I still alive? I pinch myself…..yes “said my flesh, but my soul was ignorant, my eyes were blind and without doubt my brain was lobotomized. My soul is afraid of change, of the real world, of reality, my soul is afraid of the truth. I have walked many roads and I have passed through the right turn. Was I oblivious or was I ignorant? The questions remain unanswered. Stupidly and idiotically I searched and the answers were making my heels a sleigh. What am I doing wrong and what am I not doing right? I guess that’s the most stupid thing to ask. I am stupid…….am I? No! Cupid said. Before my next breath, his arrow was already through my heart.

My soul shook, my brains froze and my heart skipped a beat. Rebirth…..baptism, I couldn’t differentiate the two. For the millionth time, my grandmother was right. “Good things take time, but greater things happen all at once”. I saw his mercy; indeed he will never live his children in darkness. All those years I walked through those different roads, ignoring the three most precious roads, life, love and you. I sang the rhythm of life, the rhythm of love and I had no tune. I found you, I found my steps, I found my rhythm.” In the rhythm of life we find ourselves out of the tune, but as long as there are special people like you…, the melody plays on! For the first time, I spoke the truth; you smiled and swept me off my feet with that raspy voice.

You uplifted my spirit and took my breath away. Believe me it was the greatest experience known to man. I spoke a language that even I don’t understand. You took me to wonderland and to paradise I journeyed. You became the essence of my soul and with every bit of my limb I exalted you as my angel and in my ears the sons and daughters of light were playing earth’s lowliest and loudest tunes. I started believing in fairytales and everything that is believed to be a myth and what I am yet to discover. You made me to swim in the river of life. I posed so many questions that no man on earth could answer except for me.

I searched my vocabulary once again and it took be by surprise when I found that I was missing one little famous word. I became overexcited and I behaved like a child and yes you did not care. You did not care one bit. The little word was heavy, the heaviest weight in my heart and I had to glance and kneel down in order to spell it out. The word is precious and it had to be covered up with something, something true and believing. The word is love and I had to put it between you and I. for the first time in my life I finally spoke of love, I always thought that it is for the weak and stupid.  I held it in my heart and took it in my mouth and wherever I go I spoke of it and how precious you are. The word was between you and I when I said I love you. Yes I love you.